Can’t cope with a 7+ ERA and having to play with the Pirates? Buy a Porsche – it’ll make all your troubles go away.

Check out Octavio Dotel’s four-door Porsche Panamera all decked out by Miami’s MCA Custom. Jalopnik says the car includes smoked taillights, edged headlights and 22-ince Vellano three-piece wheels with a black-and-white pattern.

We’re not sure which Panamera model this is, but if it is turbo, it only set Dotel back about $133,000 before mods. For a guy that taken home over $28 million in his career, he probably considers it his beater.